Conversations with Marmite: The Anticlimactic Cake

Dear Marmite

A lot has happened since I last wrote to you and, in fact I have been so busy I haven't had time to sit down and put finger to keyboard. I'll start with the family gathering for Richard's birthday last Monday. For COVID times it was quite a gathering - Danielle, Richard and Ezra-Mae, Sammi, Dylan, Reef and me but no dogs. We went to the Navigation Inn, a pub just one stop up the canal from where I now live. It is in a lovely setting and the menu is known to be good. Danielle asked me to buy a birthday cake with candles from Tesco and bring it along, which I duly did.

Dylan wanted to make a cake at my place so he did this with Sammi's help in the morning before the pub lunch. When we got to the pub Richard and Danielle were there already so it was difficult to get the cake in without Richard knowing. My stage whisper at this point didn't help. Added to this, the dipsy waitress was rushed off her feet as they were very short-staffed, so that added to the funny bits. We ordered drinks that weren't available, the pizza chef was off so the pizza order had to be changed and the boys were hungry. I am sure you get the picture, Marms... we had a slightly chaotic meal with two feral kids in tow!

When everyone had finished the main course. I got the chocolate pear cake made by Dylan with the assistance of Sammi out of my bag and plonked it on the table. I unwrapped the foil and gave it to Richard. It didn't exactly look like a birthday cake so when I wished him a happy birthday I said it was probably a bit anticlimactic. Sammi from this point on called it the ACC. Despite its lack of finesse it tasted good: even better than the Tesco, shop bought, non- anticlamactic cake.

Meanwhile, Dylan and Reef decided to play chase round the garden. Dylan's lip attacked a plant pot and both the lip and the plant pot suffered greatly. There was blood enough for a Jaws remake. This wonderful English sunny day set the tone for the week. The challenge has been to wear the grandsons out. Sammi took them climbing, we all went to Box End outdoor swimming, Sammi played tennis with Danielle and me at the club. We've been all over the place.

The biggest problem is getting the children and, to quite an extent, Sammi out of the house with all the stuff needed for each activity. All three of them leave a trail of jettisoned things - including shoes. While Dylan has been off with his Aunty Danielle and Uncle Richard today, I have gathered bits from around the house and put them in a plastic bag in preparation for Dylan leaving of Wednesday or Thursday. Reef set off to stay with his Grandfather in Sandy without vital things - a toothbrush, footwear, underwear to name but a few. God only knows what he must look like on a normal school day.

Dylan, plus guests watched the football at my place last night. It seemed all down hill after the first half and it didn't help having Dylan telling me he didn't like the game. I told him it was history being made. His idea of history is Hitler. I am sure Hitler played football at some point, if only with corned beef cans.

Another bit of history was our trip through the Bilsworth Tunnel on the Grand Union Canal. The tunnel is the longest canal tunnel in Britain. It was finished in 1805. It is 1 and 3/4 miles long and when it was repaired in 1979 the technology and engineering used for the work helped the Chunnel workers know how best to dig under the English Channel. The whole canal from London to Birmingham is 137 miles and it took 7 years to dig out with shovels. It was finished in the 1790s. That must have been back breaking. To think it takes probably that time to repair a stretch of the M1 these days!